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I just keep doing this every so often and it's just absolutely traumatizing. But I can't help it. I need to do it like a bad habit. Ew, I actualllyyy make myself sickkkkk. I'm like an addictttt. Why would I stay up and torture myself with things I can't change? Because my name is Tabitha and that's what I do, obviously. Ugh.

I'm just going to go ahead and distract myself by talking to (what is obviously) myself about nothing. Such as:

There is some leftover pad thai in my fridge from my lunch/dinner... linner.. dunch.....(I like dunch better I think.) I've been painfully full since I ate at like 4pm. By painfully full I mean I'm having heart palpitations and I'm in physical pain from being an overstuffed pig. By painfully full I also mean that I haven't even wanted to pick at anything edible (which is a rarity for me seeing as despite how overfull I get during dinner I always have room for dessert/picking at small things in the hours following.) And YET I find myself trying to talk myself into doing something disgusting like having the rest of my pad thai at 2am. It's just SO good. Don't judge me till you've had this pad thai. I'm not even remotely hungry but I really want to eat it. That can't even be healthy? I may or may not have turned into an emotional eater. Because I obviously need another issue.. I don't quite have a full collection yet...

I really should go to sleep now. And by go to sleep I mean continue doing my crossword until my brain feels like mush and I fall asleep whilst crossword puzzling. Because I'd rather not go back to torturing myself. What a healthy, non-masochistic thing to say, right? Thanks I try. 

Iwillnotgoeatmypadthaiiwillnotgoeatmypadthaiiwillnotgoeatmypadthai  

Goodniiiiight :)

tp<3

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